Wednesday, March 26, 2014

I Didn't See You There - Foot Fetishist

Here in the South, Camo abounds. More and more I see the patterns on just about anything you can imagine. Camouflage, the design that helps hunters hide and blend in wit their surroundings and, well just about everywhere.  Case in point, this pair of Croc-like rubber shoes.

I just can't see some hunter, doing some sort of Mario Batali impression out in the wild, carrying his rifle over one shoulder, tromping through the underbrush wearing these shoes. (Mario wears Crocs, and they are bright orange anyway, but I digress.  Yeah, again.)

They look nice and comfy and I'd consider buying them to add to my growing camo collection (which so far has only one item) but I wouldn't be able to wear them to work, and wearing them around the house would just lose the effect.  Besides, they are more than I really want to pay for a pair of casual shoes, so they will sit on the shelf, waiting for the right person to take them out and wear them properly - perhaps with a nice camo hat and pants. A combination truly made for the South.  

Wednesday, March 19, 2014

Southern Windshield Scraping.

This has been one long winter. Here in the south we've had cold blast after cold blast, while the north gets pummeled with snow.  Whew.  I'm so glad it's almost over.  Unfortunately, we are into that humid part of the spring where cold weather here in the south gives us a rather unique situation.  

It works like this:  I go out in the morning to head to work.  Because it was very cold overnight as well as humid, the windshield has frosted a bit.  No big deal, I know how to scrape it off. In no time flat I'm ready to drive. Only as soon as I pull out, the moisture in the southern air combines with the cold (and wind chill factor) to immediately fog up the windshield and ice over.  Using the wipers compounds this situation.  

So, now I"m stuck with one of two options - both stupid.  I can stop the car every hundred yards and scrape it until I can finally get my heater to warm enough of the windshield to keep this from blocking my view; or I can run the wipers on full, hoping that as the windshield warms, they will move the now warmed moisture over more of the glass to  help clear it so I can drive more safely.  

If I choose the second, I'm driving (slowly) down the street looking out a growing (albeit slowly growing) opening at the base of the windshield near the center and in order to see out of it I have to scrunch over and almost look through the steering wheel to see the road.  (Please, lord, let all the cops be at the doughnut shop where the doughnuts are fresh this time of day!)  I'm driving less than a couple of miles, just to the bus stop; but it seems like a heck of a lot further. And wouldn't you know it, the windshield is finally usable just as I turn into the parking lot where I meet the bus.  

Now, I hear what you're saying.  Why not warm up the car and get the windshield all cleared (and also warm the car) before I head off.  You're absolutely right, but I hate to waste the gas just sitting there, and it's warm in the house and let's face it, I really don't want to go to work. So in all, I usually don't have the time when I finally get my carcass off the couch out of the door and off to work.  More's the pity.  

My one solace is that this only happens in the spring, and hopefully next winter will be milder than this one. After all, one can usually count on mild Southern winters, and that is one of the main reasons I love living in the south!  

Wednesday, March 12, 2014

Joy Riding in the South

The winter frost has almost abated and the spring is peeking its head out from under the frozen magnolia trees here in the Mid-South.  Headed over to the bus station downtown the other day, I came across a wonderful new way to see Music City. It was sitting at a red light and I caught this photo before it roared off down the street toward the Ryman.

It's called Joy Ride Nashville.  Basically it's just a big golf cart with a driver taking you on a visual sight seeing tour of the downtown area - microbreweries, show venues and the like, or it can be reserved/commandeered like a taxi. to get you from point A to point B.  (I wonder if they would take you to play golf?) Their website has a number and some great photos but after the winter we've just had I can only see the fact that this thing has no real protection from the weather! Canvas doors, Canvas roof and plastic windows.   I'm hoping that the seats sit right over the engine and keep you warm, because those light doors and roof surely won't.  

There is nothing on the signage there that tells you how much a ride might be, and there is nothing on the website which explains the cost. I suppose it's like a lot of things: If you have to ask, you can't afford it. But, I dunno, I think it might be a great way to travel around the city, take in the sights, stop for a bite or a drink (non-light beer, like a good southerner) and enjoy life.  Isn't that what we all want to do when we're visiting a  new city?  I live here and it's what I would do. 

Wednesday, March 5, 2014

Invention Intervention - The Coat Hook

This is a great invention by a 19 yr old Southern Boy who just HAPPENS to be  my grandson.  He wanted a place to hang his coat in his room and at the same time easy to mount.  Now, let's take a look at this marvel of southern thinking.  

Do you recognize it now?

How about now?  Yes, that's right.  He salvaged the center of a 3 ring binder, took out one half of the binder clips and bingo, he's got a perfect coat hanger!  Hung it up with a couple of nails in no time flat!  It holds coats and backpacks and it's just the perfect thing for a student's room!  

Southern Thinking at its best!