Friday, September 21, 2018

Duck Tape First Aid



So, let's get the background.  I repaired a window recently.  The glass was broken when the thing was installed and it was a PVC type window and I had no real interest or knowledge in fixing it.  It was the inner pane and there was no real problem, so I left it.  I had bigger fish fix in my abode.  But it finally came to be fixed, not once, but twice.  But this is not the story of the repair, but the story of Duck Tape.  

Fast forward about a week or two after the repair and I'm walking with a pain in the side of my foot.  A simple examination discovers that it is a sliver of glass that got into my foot more than 2 weeks ago and has now worked its way into a nerve.  My wife is unable to get the dang thing out due to my screaming and jumping around while she tries to get at it with a pair of tweezers, so we turn to 'other methods.'  "Duck tape Medicine!" she says.  And I concur.  

The Internet is rife with stories of medical use of Duck Tape. (Regular readers will know this is the Duck Tape, the Silver Savior and is not Duct Tape.) There is more than enough evidence for us to try using Duck Tape to get this sliver out.  So, my wife prepares a hot tub of water and I soak my foot in it for...a while.  At least until the water is lukewarm. A long time. Then I dry the foot entirely and reach for the roll of duck tape. 

It's important to note here that we are moving and the house is a shambles of boxes and things needing to be in boxes. The fact that, while my wife heated the water, I walked into my erstwhile work area and right to the unsealed box and found the duck tape is a modern miracle by any definition.  

So, I then carefully wrapped the edge of my foot being careful to encase the puncture and the glass shard. Then, I went to bed. 

It will come as no surprise to any good ol' southerner what happened next.  

In the morning, I carefully pulled the tape off, and there, stuck to the Silver Savior, was a tiny, thin piece of glass. There are a million stories in the Duck Tape City. This has been one of them. 

Extra Internet Points for knowing the origin of the paraphrased quote above.  
I gotta go find a band aid to cover my foot.