Tuesday, October 26, 2010

Beer-ventions and Beer-novations...

Beer. Like a pack of Pavlovian Dogs, just the mention of the word 'beer' can get the typical Suthunah to salivate and crave the taste of hops and barley. What we (they) do for beer goes beyond enjoyment and borders on fanatical religion. More than just the typical Beer Hat, or foam Beer Cozy, these inventions boggle the imagination.

Today's Beer-vention and/or Beer-novation is above. This guy is home due most likely to an injury he sustained which keeps him couch ridden. One can clearly see the crutch laying there beside the couch. One can also clearly see the beer (in the proper foam beer cozy) in his right hand with a cooler of backups for when the current can is completed. (Suthuhn note: When drinking beer, one must always have a backup.)

The Suthunah in me smiles at his 'beer-novation'. He's got a bird's-eye view of the neighborhood and can act as crossing guard, neighborhood watch and air traffic controller all from the comfort of his Beer-ca-lounger. I bet he's even got himself a cell phone to call the local constabulary should something untoward occur within his 'beer-view.' His Beer-genuity using a couch rather than a simple recliner also leaves space for his wife, lady friend or BFF (Beer Filtching Friend.) Barring companionship, he's got enough room to take a nap without having to climb down from his perch.

Now, that said, the realist in me wonders at this Beer-vention. If he's injured (and the crutch would tend to support this theory,) he had to have put that couch up on the roof before the injury (or had a few neighborhood Beer-enhanced engineers to assist in the endeavor.) Additionally, he has to have some way to get UP to the roof which doesn't put a lot of strain on his injury. A ladder? Cherry Picker, perhaps?

And finally, we all know that after a few beers, one needs the use of porcelain facilities to 'recycle' the beer in the proper recycling device. I don't see one, but that doesn't mean that he doesn't have a 5 gallon jug hiding behind the trusty Beer-ca-lounger.

It is the Beer Mysteries which keep us guessing. Another in a long line of Beer-novations and exciting Beer-ventions created exclusively here in the south.

I'm so proud. I'm a bit verklempt. Yeah...I need a beer.

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